A Letter to Kathy

Dear Kathy,

I don't think I'm quite at the selecting a mentor stage yet, and I realize that was the assignment this week, so you can fail me on this post if you want. But I know we're close friends and it's nothing personal. I just feel like I have to update you on where I am in my scatterbrained process.

SO

This morning I went to the Student Entrepreneurship Conference. It was awesome. I won a pair of sunglasses and a phone case that I love. Even more valuable, I learned so much about the resources available to student entrepreneurs. Even MORE valuable, we were able to network with one another. Which is my favorite. And that's what I'm going to tell you about right quick, because I had this one interaction that may have changed my impact statement/life. No biggie.

It was breakfast, we're talking five minutes past arrival time, and I saw a fella' sitting alone; that always breaks my heart. So Dane and I plopped ourselves next to him, in our probably over-bearing presence, and started asking him uncommonly personal questions for someone we'd just met. And by we, I mean I. I have a serious problem delving into people's stories.

Here are the things we learned in the first couple minutes, solely in response to the question: "So, uh, what's your life story?"

Name: Xavi
Major: Communications
Year: Senior
Hobbies: Skiing, traveling
Religion: LDS
Political Views: Apathetic
Reason for being at the conference: (and I quote) "Eh, my friend told me to come."

So I'm assuming he's just some average kid who got dragged to this event, right? Isn't that a normal expectation? But then, and I have no idea how it came about, but he quietly mumbled something about some company he had started by himself.

The kid freakin' started and runs VolcanPaks. They were giving away one of his Paks AT the conference. And he's just so nonchalant about it, like he was dragged to the conference and like this awesome lil' startup is just something he does when he gets bored or whatever. What a humble guy.

But then I became intrigued. How does someone just design and sell backpacks out of nowhere? So I poked and prodded. How did you start? What gave you the idea? How do you execute it? Who helped you ____? How did you ____?

 Then I just kept getting more and more inspired as he talked about it. "I could do this!" I thought. In fact, this is something I've always secretly wanted to do but never felt like I had the skills.

So, Kathy, here's where I give you a disclaimer: You know all of those really wonderful, profound chats we had about how storytelling is my niche and how I should pursue it? I agree with you, and those chats helped me so much. But I don't think that's what I'm passionate about right now. At least not passionate enough to do anything about it.

Now here's where I throw you a completely random curveball: I love dresses.
Not just love, as in, I enjoy wearing them. No, like, I am the largest dress-wearing advocate in the nation. Probably.

I just think they're beautiful. I think women feel beautiful in them, I think I like myself better when I wear them. But not just any dresses. The kind of dresses that are classic. Fit and flare. Big lapelles, flattering to the body, classy, the works. And here's the kicker: dresses with sleeves that cover the knee. Unique dresses. Dresses that help you look and feel beautiful without feeling like you have to expose all of your skin.

Sara, there's already a market for that.

I know. But have you seen how expensive they are?

That's my problem. In fact, it's a problem I face a lot. Because I really don't feel comfortable in anything else, but modest dresses are hard to come across...

I buy all of my dresses second hand. Usually they're expensive for second hand, about 40 bucks. And they almost always have holes in them, or they don't fit, or the hem is funky, or they're stained. I make do with most of those problems in every article of clothing I own. But it's still better than buying cute, modest dresses new, which can cost anywhere from $60-100. How silly. It's just a dress.

So, listening to Xavi, he explained how to keep your costs low so that:

1) You can afford to start a company at all.
2) You can afford to keep your product inexpensive.

This, like all other ideas I have, is unformulated. But it's idea an that is much more inspiring than anything else I've kicked around my brain for the past few weeks, so I hope you don't mind if I abandon what I've been working on to pursue this.

When I got home from the conference, I spent hours trying to find a supplier to make the dresses and researching how to have an online startup. Turns out, I don't know much. But I'm willing to learn. And I think this will be a project I could give my soul to. Because it's more than a silly online clothing store, it's helping women feel confident.

"I want to find a better way to help women purchase inexpensive, timeless dresses because I think they increase self-esteem and are hard to come across."

It seems like a lame impact statement, but it's important to me.


Let's see... I don't want to blow off this mentor assignment entirely. I had a list of people I wanted to work with for my last idea, but they don't seem quite so applicable anymore. I met Trapper today at the conference, and although he's not faculty, I think he would be a good resource to get me connected to people who know quite a bit about the industry.

Having done my research on the people.utah.edu page, I've selected a few potential mentors.

Bonita Austin: Assistant Department Chair - Entrepreneurship & Strategy
Yehua Dennis Wei: Affiliated Faculty, Institute of Public and International Affairs (IPIA) 
Robert Wuebker: Community Foundation of Utah Social Impact Fund, University of Utah 
Assistant Professor, Strategy Department

Jack Brittain: Professor, Management Department, Pierre Lassonde Presidential Chair in Entrepreneurship, Department of Management 

To be honest, I think I need to do a little more research before I think about mentors. Agh, I feel like I end every blog post on this weird, like, "I promise, it's all coming together..." note. But, I promise! It's all coming together!

I appreciate you helping me through this strange, cavernous path. I owe you a draft of something I might say to a mentor... I'll get one to you ASAP.

Yours truly,

Sara "Scatterbrain" Best

How to: Help People be People

Life is about people.

We surround ourselves with people, we do things to either help or hurt people, we are people. So it seems to me like if I want to feel like I'm making a difference, I ought to be involved in something that will strengthen people. Not just a quick fix to a trivial problem, but some type of campaign or program that will empower people.

So I shared those ideas with people I care about. A couple family members, some friends, and the feedback I got wasn't so much of, "hey, you could do this!" or "what about this?"
 rather, it was a lot of agreeing.

My mom, for instance, agreed that she felt like old fashioned values had flown out of the window. We had a long discussion about how an increase of awareness could improve a persons day; how just one small act of kindness could totally turn around a bad mood. We agreed that decreased awareness has resulted in a decreased amount of manners.

My sister mentioned that it was getting harder and harder to have a conversation with someone. Not only because technology interferes, but we also assume that anything we need to know, we can learn from their profile. What a pathetic outlook! Being able to express what's going on in our lives is vital, almost therapeutic. And if we're not having those conversations with our own friends, it's going to be difficult to deal with things on our own.

As I'm writing this, and as I read through your feedback on my previous worksheet, I wonder if a campaign is the right alley for this. Maybe I could write some type of a column or re-occurring article or something about reestablishing what feels antiquated: old values, face-to-face communication, common courtesy. I question how effective that would be, though.

Dane and I discussed the lack of inexpensive, quality activities for teens and young adults. He said, "what is there to do for high schoolers under the age of 21, after 9 PM? Nothing! They can't go to concerts or bars or anything. They all go to the Pie Hole because it's the only place, aside from Walmart and McDonalds that's open for them. And the Pie Hole is cool."

Ha! He's right. That place is swarming with high school kids who wish they had something better to do than hang out a pizza joint. I remember that, though. The Pie Hole wasn't around when I was in High School, so we all went to the Pi Pizzeria. But if there would have been a fun, cool-because you care about that in high school- place for us to hang out in high school, either during the day or at night, that was relatively inexpensive, I think it would have kept a lot of us from getting into trouble or getting hurt.

So, I'm going to continue to let these ideas simmer. I finally feel like I'm onto something... it's vague, but it's taking a bit more shape than it has in the past.

Face the Fear

Heaven help me.  I live in fear. And I'm not shy, nor am I closed off when it comes to adventuring or exploring, outdoors or otherwise. But when it comes to making decisions, BIG life decisions, I panic. And then I don't make any decisions at all (because I don't feel capable, or I don't have the skills, or I'm too cowardly to try...)

If I were fearless...

I would start my own business.
I would learn how to sew.
I would sell the things I knit.
I would dress differently.
I would probably just, overall, be a more confident person.
I would speak to more people.
I would buy outdoor adventuring gear.
I would cook.
I would allow myself to have more personal friends.
I wouldn't worry about what my family thought about my boyfriend.
I wouldn't worry about what my family thought about my career choice.
I would probably develop a career choice.
I would write. And not just in journals in a box in my closet.
I would learn how to play an instrument. The ukelele? Or maybe the piano.


But if I were fearless, I assume I would be prideful. I assume the sarcasm I try so hard to suppress would overtake me. I have little-to-no tolerance for negativity.

But I'm so dang wishy-washy. My problem isn't identifying passions, my problem is selecting one and running with it. I'm excited to conquer my fears by first identifying them, which I'm not very good at. And facing them. Just doing the things that hold me back.

I'd like to implement the 30-day challenge. I'll let'cha know what I decide on.

Passion Feedback

Share your passions with others and seek their feedback...

I feel like I've been doing this a lot recently. I am constantly seeking approval from other people. In fact, I consider it to be a pretty big weakness of mine, one that immobilizes me from making my own decisions. But there are some people that I just trust. People that I feel motivate me. I'd like to reflect on five people who have given me sound advice in relation to the things I'm passionate about. I feel like it's not possible to express your passions to people without them giving you unsolicited advice. But I'll take all that I can get.

General passions I alluded to: A love for people. Being in an environment where people are producing new and innovative ideas. Honesty. Feeling like I'm contributing to something. Art, innovation. Working for local companies.

President Stewart Walkenhorst (Mission President from Heaven). He told me, well, a lot of things. But he told me that it doesn't matter how hard it is to live in the world. What matters is that I keep the commandments of God. Because God loves me and He wants me to be happy. He told me that if I am obedient, Heavenly Father will protect me. He will make sure that I am provided for.

Dane Goodwin (Best Boyfriend Ever). When I claim that I am not passionate about anything, and not talented in any specific area, he laughs. "You can connect with anyone." He helps me identify that I live out my passions every day just by interacting with strangers. Like that homeless guy, Jeff. Or that woman who was crying. I just can't help but interact with them. We're all human.



Sidenote: Now that I think about it, I have a very, very, very soft spot in my heart for the homeless. Especially pan handlers. They make me tear up. Every time.

Kaitland Garner (One of those Best Friends that really is the Best). One day I was crying. I told her I felt like I wasn't doing enough. I told her I felt like I didn't care about anyone, or that they couldn't feel that love. I told her I felt like I was withholding a piece of my heart from my interactions with people. Essentially, I told her I felt like I wasn't living up to my passions. And she laughed. A lot like Dane laughed; I guess I must sound ridiculous when I cry. But she said, "everything you just listed as weaknesses are your strengths".


Kathy Hajeb (The Go-and-Do Expert). I would love for you to think that I'm sucking up for sticking you in here, but your advice was so motivating that I think it made a massive dent in my quest. You listened so intently as I shared my passions and my concerns and my fears. As a missionary, we called it, "asking inspired questions". And those inspired questions helped me identify that not only do I care about human interaction, but I crave getting to know people on a deeper level. I want to learn their story. I want to learn why they do the things they do. And you reminded me of my love for documenting peoples' stories through words. I love to write; I always have. (Forgive the lack of photo. We only just met!)

Dustin Locke (Brother-in-Law Extraordinaire). He told me not to settle. He reminded me that everyone thinks someone else could do the job better than they could. But be confident. He told me I was just what everyone was looking for, they just didn't know it yet. And he saved me from working at a burrito joint, so I guess that's a success in and of itself. Solid feedback.

Some passions are tangible, easy to identify, and involve the process of creating a marketable product. I wish I had more of those. But I'm learning that my passions are more revolved around the kind of person I am, and takes on a different definition of "marketable".

Gathering Hunches

Oh boy. If I knew how to gather up hunches, you would think I wouldn't be in quite the predicament I'm currently in. I have such a long list of things that I love, and when I'm in contact with the things I love, I get so passionate about it! I love people, I love art, I love participating in and reveling in the unique ideas of others. I appreciate the hard work and dedication that others have for their passions. I guess it's always been hard for me to believe that I have that same potential to flesh out hunches. But that's probably silly.

It's like watching a documentary. I don't know about the rest of the population, but I can watch a documentary and think, "I can do that!" or "This is so important to me!".

After watching Man on Wire, "I'm going to learn how to walk on a tightrope!"
After watching that documentary about whale cruelty at Seaward, instantly I am the biggest anti-abuse advocate in the world.

To the point where my inspiration lasts for weeks, and then I let fear overtake me and end up doing nothing at all.

But I recognize that it's important; that holding onto ideas, no matter how small they may be, can be the beginning of an effective process. Because I do have good ideas! At least, I seem to think so. But nobody would ever know that because I never let them know. I never write them down, I never share them with anybody. I just let them play on repeat in my head for a few hours until the other thoughts of the day wash them out.

So I suppose this will be how I gather up hunches. I will write them down, no matter how small they may be. If there's something I think doesn't work in society, in a culture, in the world, in my surroundings, I will write it down. Then, instead of ignoring them, (because I always try to ignore the negative and focus on the positive) I will be more proactive about it. "What can I do to lend a contributing hand to this situation?"

Then I will share it with the people I trust. People who are go-and-doers, people with collaborative intentions. I think if you want to get something done, you have to be surrounded by people who also believe in your idea. Not only to motivate you, but also to contribute their own skills.

So, to narrow it down.

1. Write down small ideas/conflicts/etc...
2. Network/share them.
3. DO it.